Scheidung nach dem Urlaub

Wenn einer eine Reise tut, dann kann er viel erleben – besonders im Urlaub. Hoffnungsfroh starten wir in die schönsten Wochen des Jahres nach dem Motto : ” Nun wird alles gut, jetzt haben wir Zeit für Partner, Kind und Kegeln, endlich entspannen, ausruhn und erholen von den schweren Tagen des Jahres”.

Denkste !” – kann man da nur sagen, denn mit den meisten unserer Träume erleben wir ein Fiasko, was betrüblich wirkt. Für einen Teil der Urlaubspaare endet die gemeinsame Urlaubsfahrt sogar vor dem Scheidungsrichter.

Und was ist der Grund dafür ? Der Wechsel vom Alltag in den wochenlangen Sonntag können viele nicht gut verkraften. Paare, die alltags durchschnittlich nicht mehr als 10 min. miteinander reden haben plötzlich nahezu unbegrenzt Zeit füreinander. Das strengt an.

Und noch anstrengender wird es, wenn die Partner plötzlich schmerzhaft feststellen müssen, wie verschieden sie doch sind und das gegenseitige Urlaubserwartungen naiv und überzogen sind.

Auf diesen ´Schock`reagiert sogar der Körper.
65% der Männer werden von Kopfschmerzen geplagt, viele klagen über Muskelschmerzen und Appetitlosigkeit. Sie leiden im Urlaub vor allen Dingen darunter, dass sie “typisch weibliche” Aufgaben zu erledigen haben wie Kinder hüten, Abwaschen oder die Ferienwohnung putzen.

Nahezu 70% der Frauen fühlen sich zeitweise deprimiert und überfordert. Ihr Wunsch nach geruhsamen und behaglichen Urlaubstagen geht meist nicht in Erfüllung. Sie erleben sich vom Alltag eingeholt.

In diesen Sparzeiten dank Wirtschafts- und Finanzkrise, dank niedriger Entlohnung und teurer Lebenshaltungskosten sind Kochen und Putzen auch im Urlaub verstärkt angesagt und Hilfe vom Partner kommt meist nur widerwillig.

Nicht nur überzogene und unausgesprochene Erwartungen wirken belastend auch die Auflösung des Alltage wirkt zunehmend störend. Zuhause ist zwischen den Partnern alles geregelt, im Urlaub haben die Partner ständig neue Entscheidungen zu treffen, zeigt sich ihr Unterschied in unterschiedlichem Entscheidungsverhalten, was als so anstrengend und konflikthaft erlebt wird, dass immerhin 30% der Paare sich nach dem Urlaub scheiden lassen.

Was kann man tun, um solche unangenehme Perspektive zu vermeiden ?
Die Partner (einschließlich der Kinder) haben gemeinsam im Vorwege zu klären, wohin die Reise gehn soll, welche Unterbringung sie bevorzugen, wie sich jeder einen erholsamen Urlaub vorstellt und wie sich unterschiedliche Vorstellungen zu einem schönen gemeinsamen Uralub vereinbaren lassen. Last but not least, sollten die Beteiligten sich über das gemeinsame Geldausgeben bzw. – sparen im Urlaub Gedanken machen.

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